Eeeeegggggssss

Is that a crocodile in the water beside you? Never mind, we all need swimming buddies these days....

(Lifeguards, you know. They're pickier than they used to be.)
 
*checks Caspian's teeth* Hmmm--preferable to a crocodile's, but...have you visited the dentist lately? I'm told it's a good idea...at least, the dentists say so....
 
dentists lie all the time. my dentist said, "see you next year." well, i didn't see him. or his family, or his whole clan, tribe, or people. and you know why? because he lied.
 
Miss Freckles said:
dentists lie all the time. my dentist said, "see you next year." well, i didn't see him. or his family, or his whole clan, tribe, or people. and you know why? because he lied.
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But they tell the truth all the time, too. Like "I would like to pull your teeth." And they would like to. Very much. Because you will give them money, and money makes good mulch for the flowers along the sidewalk. And flowers give them patience (or is that patients? can't remember).
 
Miss Freckles said:
i don't think it's necessarily the money that makes them want to pull your teeth. it's more the prospect that once they've collected fifty, they get 10% off cat food at walmart. them cats are not cheap to care for.
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You mean...THAT'S WHAT THEY DID TO MY WISDOM TEETH?! :eek: I was so mad when they took them away. It was like losing a special part of me. It was losing a special part of me. My wisdom teeth lived with me for years. They agreed with me when I yelled at my history DVDs, and at the newspaper, and at the wolves under my bed. They slept with me every night. They even liked Narnia. And now my wisdom teeth are gone forever, and I will never see them again. My best friends are gone forever, all for the sake of a cat. *throws self onto bed* *sobs*
 
I mean I never saw them again. I have all my other teeth, but not those, and they didn't even ask if I wanted them. Can Scots really recover teeth lost in America? Even if the dentist threw them into the dumpster? I'm afraid he did. I'm really afraid... *huddles in corner and bites nails* Can college students get odontophobia, or does it have to start younger? *huddles* *writes letter to missing teeth*

Dear wisdom teeth,

Please come home. I miss you. My mouth has four big empty holes without you. Having you makes me feel fuller, which is important, since the food here is awful.

Love,
Glen​
 
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Dear Glen's wisdom teeth,

How do you do? I don't believe we've met, but it's never too late to make a new acquaintance. Unless you're dead, of course. But you're not dead, right? Or are you?

Are you on friendly terms with the Scots? I think they've taken my store of cheese blossoms. I'm rather upset at that, seeing as this particular species only blossoms very 37.254 years. :( Do you think you could persuade Frecklissimo to give them back?

Oh, and have you ever met Glen's lawyer? I think he retired, and I've been wondering how he's doing.

With love and cheese and toothpaste,
Lossy.
 
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Dear Lossendil,

We are very wise. Scots are not. So we do not know them. We are alive. Glen's lawyer stinks.

-The Teeth
 
Dear Glen,

Your teeth don't seem like the most talkative of folk. In fact, they seem rather... unfriendly. :( And I'm sorry to hear about your lawyer.

chickens,
Lossy.
 
Dear Lossy,

My teeth are cheerful when they're in my mouth. How do you think they're supposed to feel, all alone out in the world? I hope mf can save them.

My teeth actually have never met my lawyer; the dentist took them away before I hired him. As I said, they're in a bad mood, in a load of smelly garbage. My lawyer still wishes I would clean his office, but I have him under control.

Chocolate,
Glen
 
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