You're Banned! II

Thou art banned for trying to bring headaches down. (We've got enough mental illness in this place without adding more depression to the list.)
 
Thou art banned--how dare thou defy the Tongue! Buy thyself a new ceiling fan, and buy not thy fan in purple. Ever.
 
Thou art banned for lacking reason. Unreasonableness evidences lack of control over the passions and the appetitive nature. I.e., Plato hates you now.
 
Thou art banned, for great wit is near to madness close allied, and we are not great wits. Therefore we are reasonable.
 
You are banned because Specter used the ban button to balance out a table and, well, someone would suffer. You were banned by the leg of a table. It's a unique way to go, at least you have that knowledge.
 
Thou art banned for abandoning the Tongue, and because I just noticed that "ban" is part of the word "abandonment." Thus, failure to use Elizabethan English in this thread results in an automatic ban.
 
Yes, rule-breaking is a whole lot of fun. If you want to know, go to a prison--any prison--and interview a few people. You'll learn loads.

Thou art banned for existing.
 
Thou art banned, thou insolent popinjay! Bewail thy transgression, or I shall send thee unto the tongue that never ceaseth! (That is, whichever member of thy family talketh the most.)
 
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