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  #191  
Old 07-22-2005, 06:19 PM
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granted, but someone steals it the day after you get it, along with your entire bug collection which you were going to sacrifice to the great trashcan as you have been converted by BC, WHB and Smog to worshipping trashcans.

I wish my butterknife were sharper.
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  #192  
Old 07-22-2005, 07:32 PM
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Granted...but deprived of their trash can, Black, Smog, and HB have time to dwell upon how much sharper your knife is than theirs. To aquire such a knife they decide that you must be a witch and track you down in order to burn you at the stake. However, as they march up your front steps they see a much shiner trash can by the street curve and decide that going back to their old trash-can worshipping ways is probably for the best. They decide to sacrifice you to the trash can, but since none of them are allowed to play with matches they just blow on your ankles a lot in the hopes that you'll combust.

I wish Black Cloak would listen to me...
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  #193  
Old 07-23-2005, 06:30 PM
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Granted. You know speak Black Cloakian, the language BC speaks, which allows you to control...I mean let BC listen to you. However, all of your posts are now random, and a giant banana crushes your head.

I wish I had more ice cream...
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  #194  
Old 07-23-2005, 08:01 PM
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Granted. BC, WHB, and Smog see your ice cream and suddenly receive a vision from the trash can commanding them to sacrifice you...they may do as they like with the Ice Cream.

I wish BC, WHB, and Smog would disappear.
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Last edited by Dernhelm; 04-03-2008 at 03:18 PM. Reason: typo
  #195  
Old 07-24-2005, 08:51 AM
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Granted but then life as we know it would become utterly meaningless, and the pain and misery caused to the entire population would create a vortex of despair to form sucking the entire contents of the world into it.

I wish Smog, Black and WHB were back!
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  #196  
Old 07-24-2005, 09:21 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by waterhogboy
Granted but then life as we know it would become utterly meaningless, and the pain and misery caused to the entire population would create a vortex of despair to form sucking the entire contents of the world into it.
You're not THAT valuable!


Quote:
Originally Posted by waterhogboy
I wish Smog, Black and WHB were back!
Granted. That vortex of dispair somehow reversed, so you're unsucked back to Earth! But so is the hitchiking alien you sucked up...and the murderer...and the evil banana...and the kitty litter you dumped in there...and a month's supply of shaving cream...and, HEY, I didn't know you were in there Ithillian! I hope you understand why I threw you in there...no, of course your my friend! Just because I sold you out to the worshipping monkeys in order to save my milkshake doesn't mean I don't like you

I wish I had a pony...
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  #197  
Old 07-24-2005, 11:07 AM
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Granted...but it turns out to be one of those "My Little Pony" toys that some of us remeber playing with the last time they were popular...and as an extra bonus you are required to watch the old "My Little Pony" cartoon shows.

- I wish I was able to tell jokes that people thought were funny.

-JS
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  #198  
Old 07-24-2005, 03:14 PM
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Granted -but people only think they're funny so you are never fully satisfied that they really do find you funny. Unfortunately this drives to do more and more crazy things to try and get true laughter from your fellow man. You end up wandering the streets and getting people to pay to watch you bump into sharp objects.

I wish I had a cool car with loads of funky gadgets (that I could actually drive)
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  #199  
Old 07-24-2005, 05:56 PM
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Granted. However the Botherhood and a sister of the can decide that the trash can has send your shinny car to lead us to salvation. We devide into three different sects upon the basis of why the car was really sent her.

I believe that we are to drive the car off a cliff, thereby showing the can that we do not need material possesions because we trust it...

BC wants to drive to car to Vegas and convert others with its shinnieness...

While WHB wants to leave the car in his garage, because he fears that other people will attempt to steal this holy relic...

Since none of us can decide what to do with the car, I take it upon myself to destroy the car (because it is evil).

Three days later, I'm still blowing on it...

I wish that other people understood the above randomness...
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  #200  
Old 07-24-2005, 07:21 PM
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granted, but in order to understand it, we must have replicas for your brain to repace ours. You must set to work in a dark basement lab and spend the rest of your years on earth trying to find the way to clone brains. When you finally do you distribute them to us and we all become just like you, and b/c what people hate about other people is usually what they do themselves, you go crazy with hatred toward us and yourself and must spent the rest of your life in a insane assylum in Mexico. (can't afford one in America b/c you spent all your money on cloning brains.)

I wish there were more hours in a day.
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