The Dancing Lawn - Official Forums of Narnia Fans
FAQ Members List Calendar Search Today's Posts Mark Forums Read

Go Back   The Dancing Lawn - Official Forums of Narnia Fans > The Lantern Waste > The Professor's Writing Club

The Professor's Writing Club Poetry, Fan Fiction, etc

View Poll Results: Who is your favorite character?
James Perrison 2 100.00%
Kayla River 0 0%
Stanley Buchwald 0 0%
Rebecca Fironté 0 0%
Carl Perrison 0 0%
Voters: 2. You may not vote on this poll

Reply
 
Thread Tools
  #21  
Old 05-01-2012, 02:13 PM
Zella's Avatar
Zella Zella is offline
Friend of Narnia
 
Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: Probably Narnia, Middle Earth, or Celania.
Posts: 6,238
Zella is a jewel in the roughZella is a jewel in the roughZella is a jewel in the roughZella is a jewel in the rough
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Sopespian View Post
Anyone notice the subtle difference in time between this world and ours in the last chapter?
I did!

Ooh, my. Exciting developments. That poor couple. But I am glad it was not James and Kayla.
__________________

That is the question:
Whether 'tis nobler in the mind to suffer
The slings and arrows of outrageous fortune,
Or to take arms against a sea of troubles,
And by opposing end them? To die: to sleep;
No more; and by a sleep to say we end
The heart-ache and the thousand natural shocks
That flesh is heir to; 'tis a consummation
Devoutly to be wish'd.
Reply With Quote
  #22  
Old 05-15-2012, 03:43 PM
Glenburne's Avatar
Glenburne Glenburne is offline
Scourge of Squirreldom
 
Join Date: Dec 2008
Location: between bookcases
Posts: 2,143
Glenburne is just really niceGlenburne is just really niceGlenburne is just really niceGlenburne is just really nice
Default

I'm looking forward to your next update.
__________________
My literature blog, FirstFire

Poet and sculptor, do the work,
Nor let the modish painter shirk
What his great forefathers did.
Bring the soul of man to God,
Make him fill the cradles right.
Reply With Quote
  #23  
Old 05-16-2012, 01:31 AM
Sopespian's Avatar
Sopespian Sopespian is offline
Friend of Narnia
 
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: My heart stays in Indianapolis
Posts: 1,099
Sopespian is just really niceSopespian is just really niceSopespian is just really niceSopespian is just really niceSopespian is just really nice
Talking

Quote:
Originally Posted by Glenburne View Post
I'm looking forward to your next update.
So am I. Unfortunately, I have fifty-four hours of work this week, so updating might be a bit difficult.
__________________
Please call me "Mike" or "Michael". Only Inkspot may call me "Sweetie".



Check out StoryForum One, a community for storytelling.

Drive through Indiana
Meet the man
Plowed that earth, planted that seed
Busted his back for you and me
Reply With Quote
  #24  
Old 05-16-2012, 01:58 PM
Glenburne's Avatar
Glenburne Glenburne is offline
Scourge of Squirreldom
 
Join Date: Dec 2008
Location: between bookcases
Posts: 2,143
Glenburne is just really niceGlenburne is just really niceGlenburne is just really niceGlenburne is just really nice
Default

Uggh. Never mind the update...get some sleep.
__________________
My literature blog, FirstFire

Poet and sculptor, do the work,
Nor let the modish painter shirk
What his great forefathers did.
Bring the soul of man to God,
Make him fill the cradles right.
Reply With Quote
  #25  
Old 05-16-2012, 03:51 PM
Sopespian's Avatar
Sopespian Sopespian is offline
Friend of Narnia
 
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: My heart stays in Indianapolis
Posts: 1,099
Sopespian is just really niceSopespian is just really niceSopespian is just really niceSopespian is just really niceSopespian is just really nice
Talking

Quote:
Originally Posted by Glenburne View Post
Uggh. Never mind the update...get some sleep.
I'll do that.
__________________
Please call me "Mike" or "Michael". Only Inkspot may call me "Sweetie".



Check out StoryForum One, a community for storytelling.

Drive through Indiana
Meet the man
Plowed that earth, planted that seed
Busted his back for you and me
Reply With Quote
  #26  
Old 06-09-2012, 03:21 AM
Sopespian's Avatar
Sopespian Sopespian is offline
Friend of Narnia
 
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: My heart stays in Indianapolis
Posts: 1,099
Sopespian is just really niceSopespian is just really niceSopespian is just really niceSopespian is just really niceSopespian is just really nice
Talking

Well, I finally got another chapter done. Enjoy!

6. Surprise!

Alone in a small basement that night, Rebecca and Buchwald discussed their plan. “Shall we go for a late stroll to get a feel for our surroundings?” Rebecca suggested. She didn’t feel comfortable there with Buchwald.
“Yeah, we- we really should. And I wanna- I wanna ask Country what other cities this might connect to. Maybe- maybe the Keepers aren’t in Vidson anymore.”
So they set off to become acquainted with the vicinity of their dwelling. What they noticed most were all the people. Huddled in corners or spread out across relatively large spaces, they looked desperate and wary. As the network branched out toward the edge of the city, Rebecca and Buchwald continued to make their way around the masses of people who stared, some suspiciously, other menacingly, at the two. Finally they ran across Country, who was sleeping while seated on an old pickle bucket.
“Hey- hey, Country! Wake up!” yelled Buchwald, awakening the middle-aged, scruffy fugitive. While it took Country a little while to come to, Buchwald had no patience for his grogginess, roughing him up and shaking his head back and forth. His haste was ill-received, however, as Country promptly rose from his seat and flattened Buchwald with one blow. While Rebecca merely observed from a constant position, other undergrounders emerged from the shadows to get a closer view of the action. They knew – and all too well – that Buchwald had made a horrible miscalculation assuming Country to be timid and passive. Finally Rebecca picked Buchwald up and pulled him over to what she thought was an unoccupied corner (she found out differently by the grunting of an under-dweller upon whom she nearly sat as he vacated the corner, mumbling something about newcomers uprooting respected citizens).
“Now you’ve done it,” Rebecca chided. “How are we supposed to stay here when you’ve just roused the anger of a monster?”
“Monster- monster nothing,” Buchwald growled. “He just- just caught me off guard, is all.”
Rebecca rolled her eyes. She would have done better to keep her eyes on the events unfolding in the middle of the room, however. Country, an impulsive man if one ever existed, was rounding up supporters to “chase them to the mountains” because he didn’t “like the newbies”. She nearly sensed the sudden development too late; however, she took off running just in time, dragging Buchwald as though he were a sack of corn.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

Though he felt half-dead, Carl Perrison could fairly feel the lights of Calmer, Stalcia drawing him in like a magnet. Were it not for those lights, he would have collapsed exhausted hours earlier. As it was, the lights seemed never to get any closer until he was almost on top of them. The door of the first home on the outskirts of the city looked inviting to his tired eyes (though at this point, a prison cell would have looked appealing to him), so he knocked on it. A balding man with a full brown beard opened the door. He looked kindly, so Carl proceeded, or rather stumbled, into the doorway – and then he did collapse.
When he awoke a few hours later, he was lying on his back looking up at the man who had taken him in. Finally, Carl felt comfort and warmth. He tried to sit up and the man allowed him to. Then the bearded man hurried over to a table, took a bowl off of it, and gave it to Carl. Carl had never tasted anything so delicious in all his life, though the contents of the bowl were mere oatmeal. The other man pulled up a chair next to Carl and only then did Carl notice his surroundings. He was in a sparsely furnished, well-lit room with plush carpet and many windows. He saw an open door leading to another room, the table, and his bed, which was actually a couch. He was wearing only a robe but saw fresh, clean clothes set on the table. Near the window grew various plants and flowers in pots, adding to the natural look of the room.
Eventually the man spoke. “Suppose you tell me who you are.” His voice was high of pitch and soft.
Carl turned, wincing, to face the man. “I am Carl Perrison. What is your name?”
“My name is Thaddeus Jotham. Tell me, Carl, are you a Dathin?”
Carl started. “Why do you ask?!” he queried rapidly.
Thaddeus laughed. His laugh was refreshing and calming and he continued, “Don’t be alarmed. I’ve taken in many people to my home – Dathins, Manaretians, even a Kathfiran once. I accept all who will accept me. I may be seen as a bit eccentric and may be looked down upon by those in my community, but I do not turn a man away due to the color of his skin or the nation of his origin. Now, Carl, do you consider yourself a sympathizer with the Clarions or the Fir-”
“I’m a Clarion,” Carl interrupted roughly. “What’s it to you?”
“Again, absolutely nothing. While your family may make a world of difference to you, I find it to be of no consequence.”
Carl was still suspicious. “If you’re such a great man, why does the community think ill of you?”
Thaddeus looked down, sighing. “Carl, if ever you are to be a great man, you must not be overly concerned with how others see you. You must be concerned with how the Master sees you. Because they do not see with lack of prejudice as does the Master, my brethren in this city revile me for taking in all people without preference. And yet such is the Master’s will. He has called us to love one another, and has not specified that we love only those who look similar to us. Not that I am a great man – I am merely a servant who is blessed with the opportunity of worshipping the Almighty.”
Carl was stunned. He had never heard anyone talk like this, for Dathinell was not a religious nation. He could say nothing for a great while. Then he turned around more fully as something in the corner of the room had caught his eye. He nodded toward a large brown object. “What’s that?” With a lid opened at slant from the side, what looked like many small levers resting on the sunken front, and three-foot-high legs, the furnishing and its curvature were quite beautiful to behold.
Thaddeus chuckled. “That is called a piano. Allow me to demonstrate.” He sat down on the bench in front of it and cleared his throat. As Thaddeus’ fingers manipulated the keys, Carl heard the most beautiful sounds that he had ever heard in his life. He was utterly astonished. Dathins did not care for melodic or harmonic music and it was rarely heard in their country. Carl had never before seen, let alone heard, a piano. The extent of his musical experience was hearing the rhythmic sounds of drummers in Dathinell. Never had he taken in real music that made it sound as if the room were alive with beauty, complexity, and vibrancy.
When Thaddeus was finished, Carl began to take the fresh clothes in hand, but Thaddeus interrupted him. “First you take a bath. Lay back down while I draw one for you.” With that, he exited the room, leaving Carl to himself and his thoughts, which were a swirling torrent of confusion.
When his bath was finished (he had taken his time, for such were Thaddeus’ orders), he reluctantly stepped out of the water, dried off with a plush, oversized towel, and changed into the clean clothes. Opening the bathroom door, he entered a hallway and set off to find Thaddeus in what he had recently realized was a rather large house. Entering a room filled from top to bottom with bookshelves which were laden down with books, he discovered Thaddeus sitting in an easy chair, reading a sizeable book.
“Oh, there you are, Carl,” Thaddeus greeted him.
“Yes. Uh, Mr. Jotham –”
“ ‘Thaddeus’,” Thaddeus corrected.
“Thaddeus,” Carl continued. “Thank you for your hospitality. I’ll be on my way now.”
Thaddeus rose and placed the book on a table beside him. “No, Carl, you oughtn’t to leave yet. There is still much you must learn about living in Stalcia. I am the only person around who will teach you. I would be delighted to care for you until you can support yourself.”
“I- I want to get to Manaret,” Carl stammered.
Thaddeus’ voice was barely above a whisper. “Carl – you can’t run forever. If you must go to Manaret eventually, at least build a firm foundation here in Calmer first. Besides, we hardly know each other yet. Sit, won’t you, and tell me your story.”
Carl sat, hesitantly, in a chair across from Thaddeus, who poured a hot beverage from a pitcher and served him. Carl drank and again his senses were rattled, this time by the delicious sweetness of tea, a drink relatively unknown to the coffee-loving Dathins, though a favorite drink of his cousin James. He proceeded to disclose his life story to Thaddeus, who henceforth returned the favor.

(continued in next post)

__________________
Please call me "Mike" or "Michael". Only Inkspot may call me "Sweetie".



Check out StoryForum One, a community for storytelling.

Drive through Indiana
Meet the man
Plowed that earth, planted that seed
Busted his back for you and me

Last edited by Sopespian; 07-30-2012 at 03:56 AM.
Reply With Quote
  #27  
Old 06-09-2012, 03:24 AM
Sopespian's Avatar
Sopespian Sopespian is offline
Friend of Narnia
 
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: My heart stays in Indianapolis
Posts: 1,099
Sopespian is just really niceSopespian is just really niceSopespian is just really niceSopespian is just really niceSopespian is just really nice
Talking

(continued from previous post)

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

Now on the run, Buchwald and Rebecca rushed as fast as they could through corridors and passages that smelled of death. They were both unaware of their direction, but were at all times focused on evading those following them. When Country, a good fifty paces behind them, called out, “They’re headed to Reeves!” to his posse, the pair’s pounding footsteps quickened, for they were on their way to a Fironté city. This apparent eagerness only angered their Clarion-sympathizing pursuers.
“C’mon!” Country yelled, “Hurry up! They’s Firontés!”
After an hour of running at top speed, the two finally and cleverly lost the posse. Not a great deal of time passed before they realized that they were again walking under a city, after having run away from Vidson. Eventually, they ran across a few people after having opened a heavy metal door that barred their way. “Where are we?” Rebecca asked the new faces, a trio seated at a table; one of whom was rising, armed.
“You’re underneath Ewing, and I’m Clownface. What do you want?”
Rebecca and Stanley looked at each other, startled. The last place in which they had expected to find themselves was Ewing, another Clarion city. Rebecca tried to retain her composure. “We don’t want to be quarantined or vaccinated, and need to hide out down here,” she announced. Unlike James and Kayla, who were not aware of many things happening in Dathinell, she and Stanley were quite current on the news and knew of Ewing’s epidemic.
“What are your names?” Clownface asked.
“I’m- I’m Stanley Buchwald and this- this is Rebecca Gerard,” Stanley piped up.
“Are you loyal to the family?” Clownface persisted.
“Yes,” Stanley lied, with some difficulty.
“Then what’s the Clarion family password?”
The Clarion family password was not merely a word, but a series of words used by Clarions to identify each other. Fortunately, Rebecca had stumbled upon the words earlier in her life and had memorized them. Once she had recited them to Clownface, he was satisfied and put away his weapon.
“Like to introduce ya to some newcomers to the city. This here’s James Perrison,” here he pointed to the man seated next to him, “and that’s Kayla River.”
As soon as Rebecca and Buchwald heard the name “River” and saw just how much Kayla looked like her late cousin Vanessa, they drew their own weapons and prepared to fire.
__________________
Please call me "Mike" or "Michael". Only Inkspot may call me "Sweetie".



Check out StoryForum One, a community for storytelling.

Drive through Indiana
Meet the man
Plowed that earth, planted that seed
Busted his back for you and me
Reply With Quote
  #28  
Old 06-09-2012, 12:35 PM
Copperfox's Avatar
Copperfox Copperfox is offline
Friend of Narnia
 
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: Colorado
Posts: 23,625
Copperfox is a glorious beacon of lightCopperfox is a glorious beacon of lightCopperfox is a glorious beacon of lightCopperfox is a glorious beacon of lightCopperfox is a glorious beacon of light
Default

Did you name a character Vanessa in honor of our Vanessa?

The surprise meeting of James and Kayla reminded me of a classic Shaw Brothers kung-fu movie, "Eighteen Weapons of Kung-Fu." In it, a male and female kung-fu expert set out on a mission independently of each other, and only after a skirmish did the man find out that his opponent was a woman in disguise. Things did not get amorous between them so immediately as with James and Kayla, but by the end of the movie it was at least a possibility that they would get married.
__________________
Reply With Quote
  #29  
Old 06-09-2012, 12:48 PM
Sopespian's Avatar
Sopespian Sopespian is offline
Friend of Narnia
 
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: My heart stays in Indianapolis
Posts: 1,099
Sopespian is just really niceSopespian is just really niceSopespian is just really niceSopespian is just really niceSopespian is just really nice
Talking

Quote:
Originally Posted by Copperfox View Post
Did you name a character Vanessa in honor of our Vanessa?

The surprise meeting of James and Kayla reminded me of a classic Shaw Brothers kung-fu movie, "Eighteen Weapons of Kung-Fu." In it, a male and female kung-fu expert set out on a mission independently of each other, and only after a skirmish did the man find out that his opponent was a woman in disguise. Things did not get amorous between them so immediately as with James and Kayla, but by the end of the movie it was at least a possibility that they would get married.
...Maybe. Okay, okay, yes, I did name a character after Vanessa. I admit it.

That's quite interesting. I have the feeling I've seen the concept before myself, but I can't think of where.
__________________
Please call me "Mike" or "Michael". Only Inkspot may call me "Sweetie".



Check out StoryForum One, a community for storytelling.

Drive through Indiana
Meet the man
Plowed that earth, planted that seed
Busted his back for you and me
Reply With Quote
  #30  
Old 06-09-2012, 03:11 PM
Aravis Kenobi's Avatar
Aravis Kenobi Aravis Kenobi is offline
Friend of Narnia
 
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Writing. Working. Reading.
Posts: 19,070
Aravis Kenobi is just really niceAravis Kenobi is just really niceAravis Kenobi is just really niceAravis Kenobi is just really nice
Default

I just got done catching up, and I'm very, very impressed. I even have been ignoring NCIS on tv just to read this.

Anyways, I think you should consider having this published. You're a very talented writer, and I look forward to more.
__________________
Banner made by Gondorgirl, by request. Please ask before taking.
Click here to read my Star Wars fan fiction.
"A great leap forward often requires taking two steps back. "
Reply With Quote
Reply

Bookmarks

Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump


All times are GMT -4. The time now is 06:17 PM.

Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.6
Copyright ©2000 - 2014, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Copyright ©2003-2014, NarniaFans.com