Welcome to the DLF Cafe

PrinceOfTheWest

Knight of the Stone Table
Royal Guard
Emeritus
Seriously. In downtown DeWitt, Michigan.

Dlfcafe.scaled.jpg


Somehow, I never thought of him as the entrepreneurial type...
 
I've heard that the nightmare island from "Dawn Treader" has a fast-food joint for castaways who are especially fearful. It's called "Kentucky Fright for Chickens."
 
No guarantees of anything. You can enter, but there's no guaranter that you, or any particular item of your clothing, will leave.
 
I'd like to welcome everyone back to the Grand Re-opening of the DLF cafe. I'm Machia The Marshwiggle, the new proprietor of this fine establishment. You can call me Mr. Respectowiggle...

We serve almost anything you could ever want here. But no pickles... SO DON'T ASK FOR THEM!!!! :mad:

Please feel free to peruse the menu... Volumes 1-35 can be found here in the lobby. 36-47 can be found under the bar (coffee bar, of course) Vol.'s 47 - 167 are doubling as the floor, Volume 168 has been lost since the year 1582... There's a 10 cent reward if you find that... The rest of the volumes of the menu (169-26,786,045.8 are scattered about here and there. Just look around...

Sit anywhere you like, but just remember when the music starts you have to get up and change seats. And then the normal rules for musical chairs apply. (Take out boxes are complimentary to the losers)

Wi-Fi is complimentary.. Assuming you can pass the test administered by the Ancient One, aka The Keeper of the Internet, aka Fred.

Every Thursday is Waffle Thursday. Attendance is required. (Minimum purchase of $45.13)

More info as it becomes available! But come on in and have a seat! *Opens door, which makes a loud quaking noise as it opens*

Now Hiring!
 
Hi, I'd like to order a baker's dozen of new members. A smattering of new game ideas. Do you sell Mafia games?

And hold the pickle.
 
Hi, I'd like to order a baker's dozen of new members. A smattering of new game ideas. Do you sell Mafia games?

And hold the pickle.

I'm sorry, I am prohibited by law; I can't sell any new members to GG... It'll scare off new customers. Your reputation for eating things proceeds you. In fact, your picture is actually over there behind the bar.

I can get you those games though. The Last Post game is a little stale - I hope you don't mind. They come with a side salad and your choice of dressings. I recommend our cardigans, they are very good this season I have to say.

I have a sad story to tell you... No wait! We just got a new shipment of Mafia games... Be careful though, the after-taste sometimes gives our customers a bad case of betrayal and an acute pain in their backs.

Hold the WHAT?????!!! *Gives a dark look as I put in your order*

Oh, yeah, anything to drink?
 
Woah! Nobody told me about the mandatory dinner dates on Thursdays... How dear of the dlf to charge such confusing prices...
 
Woah! Nobody told me about the mandatory dinner dates on Thursdays... How dear of the dlf to charge such confusing prices...

He prefers to think of it as "visionary", "ground-breaking", "industry leading".. words that that... Just check out the review of out cafe in the latest edition of "Loonies I Have Lunched With" a wonderful magazine by Sir Roderick Glossop...

Now are you ordering something? If not, there's a $21.42 charge for every minute of air you breathe for non-ordering customers....
 
I'm sorry, I am prohibited by law; I can't sell any new members to GG... It'll scare off new customers. Your reputation for eating things proceeds you. In fact, your picture is actually over there behind the bar.

I can get you those games though. The Last Post game is a little stale - I hope you don't mind. They come with a side salad and your choice of dressings. I recommend our cardigans, they are very good this season I have to say.

I have a sad story to tell you... No wait! We just got a new shipment of Mafia games... Be careful though, the after-taste sometimes gives our customers a bad case of betrayal and an acute pain in their backs.

Hold the WHAT?????!!! *Gives a dark look as I put in your order*

Oh, yeah, anything to drink?

Awwwwwwwwwwww. Well if I can't have new members, I suppose I'll just take the old rejects.

As far as drink, I would like some Pop stars.

*Storms in* Give me my trousers back, you lunatics!

Hey! I'm quite sure this is one of those no-shirt-no-shoes-no-trousers no service kind of establishments. You're not allowed in here!
 
Or in one of his fairy tales. You could donate your soul somewhere and have a tragic death.
 
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